and the winner is

I'm sick today, ceremoniously handing over the victory cup to the virus I've been staving off for days now and feeling totally defeated. Funny thing is if you keep smiling and pretend you're not getting sick the virus is not fooled into giving up. If you tell it you don't have time to get sick, chances are it won't care. Viruses are smart and they don't listen to a word you say...welcome to my life.

On a brighter note, if I can muster one, I heard a keynote address by Ann Cannon, my favorite feature writer for the Deseret News last night while trying not to get sick. As usual, she moved me. She advised, amid a number of endearing stories of her imperfect world to which I totally relate, to 1) find the humor 2) revise the ideal 3) cherish what you have, today and 4) just keep at it. I felt normal and it felt good.

She also suggested writer-wanna-bes like me who don't have time to write should spend 20 minutes a day writing and that many of her writer friends have finished entire books after a year of this exercise. I have no such aspirations; but I do like to write.

And my 20 minutes is up...

case sensitive

If you're reading this blog we're probably in the same boat as far as remembering dozens of passwords that continually change. I sign in with one to get on the internet, but once I'm there it doesn't end. It seems every site I go to requires another login and password.

Thinking i'd outsmart the madness, I initially tried using the same words for everything; then they all started demanding unique criteria...at least 8 characters...case sensitive...some alpha...some numeric...some both. And if that doesn't make you crazy, there are those that require you to change your passwords on a regular basis. The complexity continues.

Add to that a little paranoia that those other lizburts in the world might beat me to the username availability page of the next great website; or that my kids will figure out the best password that locks down iTunes or the parental controls (just hope they don't figure out its also the banking password) and I'll have to change everything around again. Its no wonder that I have found myself at the store checkout entering my student number rather than my bankcard pin; or that I can't answer the secret questions that will reveal the passwords I can't remember.

If you only knew the tangled intricacies I've spun to try to make memorable passwords only to lose my mind in the very labyrinth I have created. I thought these little tricks would help me remember them better, like Hansel and Grettle's crumbs, but they only make more things to forget...can't really explain it to you....'cause then I'd have to change my passwords all over again...

it's in the air

An assistant said to me today, "All your work is done." What she meant was that everything I had given her to do was done but the way I wanted to interpret it was much better. The phrase lingered in the air all day like the smell of baking cinnamon rolls. Wouldn't it be nice!

At the same time, I am grateful for work. There is work to do where ever I am. Work gives life a sense of purpose and order. There's nothing quite like the feeling of a job well done. To deeply savor relaxation and recreation you must be well acquainted with its opposite.

Good thing I feel this way about work today...'cause I've got a lot of it...

not my feet

Procrastination is my constant companion; sometimes my nemesis. I tell myself its because I work better under pressure...but that's a lie. I think the real reason is fear. Fear of starting something that will steal my time and freedom. I'm in a tug of war with whatever I need to do and procrastination is on my side...or is it?

Blogging is a great way to procrastinate. And searching the internet for some picture with a blue sky in it that might personify procrastination ranks up there with the likes of scrapbooking on the "meaningless activities" list.

So now I need to say just a word about scrapbooking; because I am an openly-anti-scrapbooking mother. This may give you pause to wonder just what kind of mother I am. Can a mother with this type of ideology really be a good one? You might ask... What kind of a mother does not spend hours cutting a pasting clever sayings and images to pictures of her life and the lives of her family in order to fully highlight the glory of said life? Doesn't she want look at the scrapbooks over and over and have her children look at them over and over knowing all the while that, indeed, it is the scrapbooks which fully recreate the glory of the memories?

Truth be told, that whole paragraph right there is really just a fabulous example of my nemesis...on so many levels.